Honoring My Love

Title: Honoring My Love
Author: Naina (Suganain)
Rating: PG
Word Count: 1,073
Disclaimer:I do not own DBSK or TOP. This is a work of fiction. This was written for fun. No profit is being made and no copyright infringement is intended.
Author's Note: This is a different genre, that I have never written before. I hope KC and everyone else enjoys reading this piece. Happy Birthday to you KC! And Enjoy reading the story! XOXO




Love is an unconditional, eternal human emotion. The phrase “falling in love” has been said by many people. But, I believe someone doesn’t fall in love, instead they are destined to be in love. I also was introduced to the love of my life and coincidentally learned many things. Through those early childhood life experiences I was taught the true meaning of friendship. Life showed me how important friends are, and how to deal with the emotions of an eternal loss.

On January 13th, 1995 I found my first best friend and he was a boy named Yunho. At the age of fourteen I knew there was something special about. We met in my 9th grade Science class, and I did not want to dissect the dead cat, that didn't matter if I wanted to or not because I forgot to get an excuse note from my parents. Thank goodness, Yunho was in class, when the teacher wasn’t looking he gave me his dissected cat and ended up not getting a good grade for that project. To make it up for him, I told him I would help him do his English project on Edgar Allan Poe. He told me how much he hated Edgar Allan Poe and poetry in general. The only problem was I just volunteered to help him with a project that I myself was having trouble in. So, we ended up getting a bad grade together, and I barely remember how we even passed 9th grade. Yunho and I were called the dynamic duo, and always had our crew with us. Together, we often ditched class and headed to the nearby Dunkin Donuts or headed to a movie, always ending up in trouble in the end. Although, I started the year with several bad grades I ended up gaining a loyal best friend who became my protector in high school.

In 10th grade my friendship with Yunho turned into a much more meaningful relationship. During this time my relationship with my parents wasn't so great. They didn’t approve of my relationship with Yunho and believed the rumors that Yunho and his family were the biggest Korean drug dealers in town. My family judged him based on his dressing style and his overall appearance; but I knew the truth that they didn't approve of him was because of his ethnicity. So for many weeks I ended up arguing with my mother just to go out and meet him. The trust and friendship I had with my family ended. The fact that they couldn’t understand my love for Yunho was something I couldn’t comprehend.

On a really cold winter night, Yunho called my phone to meet him outside. I remember that night very vividly, and it was a scary situation because it was my first time sneaking out. Yunho had a picnic basket with him he was dressed sharp as a prince from one of those extravagant British royal houses, except my man was a sexy Korean hunk. I came outside wearing baggy sweatpants and a huge New York Yankees sweatshirt. I was embarrassed at the predicament I was in but he said I looked extremely sexy, and that compliment itself made me weak in my knees. He asked me to get in the car because we were headed to his parent’s house for a romantic picnic dinner and the fact that they weren’t home was a plus! When we arrived in his warm living room, I was astonished to smell the whole room with a beautiful aroma of Lilac candles; they were lit around the living room. I looked at him and he had a mischievous glint in his eyes, when suddenly I remembered what the date was and started feeling guilty. Yunho knew all my facial emotions, and wiped my tears away. I started expressing how I felt so embarrassed not remembering today was the first time we met. He shushed me with his lips and carried me to the sofa as if I was fragile glass doll. We sat down on the velvet carpet and started eating the delicious picnic food that he made himself. After, we finished eating; I asked him where my dessert was? Yunho laughed and said he didn’t make a dessert for me, but he wanted me as his dessert. I was a clueless girl not understanding where he was getting at. That night was an unforgettable night because it was also the night I made love to my first boyfriend.

The funeral was one of the most difficult experiences in my life. I remember the whole junior class was there and it was packed with teachers, relatives, and loved ones like me. I couldn’t even bring my head up to see his open casket and when I did I ended up dropping to the floor and crying uncontrollably. TOP, Yunho's best friend had to support me and help me get out of the funeral area. He asked me to take slow breathes, but all I wanted to do was kill myself. After all, it was my fault that he ended up in this predicament, if we hadn’t argued the other day, Yunho wouldn’t have driven his motorcycle recklessly. TOP held on to me and explained that it wasn’t my fault, he accused destiny for Yunho’s fate. I laughed painfully; I told him he didn’t understand my pain. He responded you lost your boyfriend; I lost my best friend How is the pain not the same? That day, I did lose my boyfriend, my best friend, but fate also left me another best friend who helped me through my grief. For several days I didn’t want to talk to anyone but TOP. I knew he was the only one that understood what I was going through, and unlike other people who knew Yunho including his family. Only TOP and I knew how Jung Yunho was an amazing human being.

Today, I’m married to the 2nd love of my life, and TOP admits that and he knows that he is not my first. TOP and Yunho have so many similarities sometimes I forget how to separate the two. Yunho left a part of himself with me, in the form of our son Moonbin. The days I do remember him, TOP and I take Moonbin to speak to his father and my first love at his grave site.

"We will stay connected, in each others hearts."